10,001 Things To Be Pissed About

1,842

2011-09-28T23:46:00.000-07:00

Lady boss, just admit you don't know. So much more flattering than watching you try to keep up.

1,841

2011-09-28T23:39:00.000-07:00

I tried to be tolerant, but this Jesus-BS just banned you from my facebook wall:

"So I thank Christ that His blood pressure gave this heart an attack that
Flatlined my obscured vision, put me flat on my back
Through my ignorance, He saw.
Through my sternum, He saw to crack open my chest
to transplant Psalm 51:10..."

Thank Christ when you have a real heart attack.

1840

2011-08-30T17:49:00.001-07:00

Looking for a window to put your fist through.

1839

2011-08-30T17:48:00.000-07:00

Boss needs a re-write.
Well. We all need something you
ever loving cunt.

1838

2011-08-30T13:29:00.001-07:00

4 posts and I'm super-fucking pissed.

1837

2011-08-30T13:23:00.001-07:00

Support Our Troops stickers. Yeah I get the need to not shit on troops for fighting a war I don't agree with. The grievance is with the policy makers. I get that. And so does everyone. We all do support our troops as long as it's clapping for them when they walk through airports. But given that the US military still won't acknowledge Gulf War Syndrome and pay for treatment, won't acknowledge the continuing danger of using U238 shells, and won't acknowledge that the wars we fight are tending to create more wars (hell we can't even get unlimited healthcare to emergency personnel of 9/11) I don't any of that is doing any good to the actual troops. In fact, Support Our Troops seems more like code for Support Our Wars.

1836

2011-08-30T13:20:00.000-07:00

The fact that I just said "financial products." It's not a product. It's not something on shelves in a store that you can browse, purchase, and use. It's a loan. Call it a loan.

1835

2011-08-30T13:16:00.000-07:00

Going over financial products for hours only to find out the next day that because my credit rating, while actually being pretty solid, isn't in the upper echelons of those who've never had a single financial transgression in their whole life, I don't qualify for the loans I can afford. But I do qualify for loans that would stretch my budget to the limit. Which you would think would be bad since, I don't know, giving people loans they can barely afford pretty much created this whole mess we're in. One would think they'd want to work with terms so the borrower could actually make the payments instead of eventually filing for bankruptcy and not pay them anymore.

1834

2011-08-30T13:15:00.001-07:00

Career inertia.

1833

2011-08-24T06:38:00.001-07:00

Little earthquakes.

1832

2011-08-18T20:55:00.001-07:00

Faked out by job. Stupid f-n job.

1,831

2011-05-26T23:58:00.000-07:00

Getting paid about $7 an hour to transcribe Russian-accented doctors talking about urinary incontinence.

1,830

2011-05-25T15:26:00.002-07:00

I just really have no idea what I'm doing.

1,829

2011-05-25T15:26:00.000-07:00

Social blundering.

1,828

2011-05-03T09:34:00.000-07:00

How close that precipice is and how easy it would be to just walk right off the cliff into the nothing.

1,827

2011-04-27T15:30:00.001-07:00

You can't take a picture of this, it's already gone.

1,826

2011-03-16T15:15:00.001-07:00

Automatic Word formatting. I know if I want the word to be capitalized. Really, I know.

1,825

2011-02-28T14:00:00.000-08:00

Family members not believing you when you explain your baby is sick and why. That somehow we are making it up. That somehow it is all some elaborate lie (WHAT PURPOSE WOULD THIS SERVE, PLEASE TELL ME) because we are "too sensitive" or something. Tell you what. You sit up all night with a baby in crazy ear pain every night for three weeks and then tell me I'm being "dramatic."

1,824

2011-02-28T13:55:00.004-08:00

And, the ole' standby: no sleep.

1,823

2011-02-28T13:55:00.002-08:00

Watching baby suffer and being unable to help.

1,822

2011-02-28T13:55:00.000-08:00

ELEVEN WEEKS, this baby has been sick. ELEVEN WEEKS.

1,821

2011-02-18T22:38:00.000-08:00

Random stomach viruses that make the successful eating of one f%&%#ing rice cake feel like a real victory for humanity.

1,820

2011-01-20T10:22:00.001-08:00

Losing someone you love in a horrible, inexplicable way that breaks your heart on a daily basis.

1,819

2011-01-20T10:21:00.003-08:00

MUCH worse: your little child being very sick for a whole month and feeling utterly helpless.

1,818

2011-01-20T10:21:00.001-08:00

Being sick for a whole month.

1,817

2011-01-19T18:08:00.001-08:00

We are closing in on the FOUR YEAR anniversary of this blog and haven't even cracked 2,000. People, get pissed will you?

1.816

2011-01-19T18:06:00.000-08:00

Forced airing of grievances.

1,815

2010-12-22T09:58:00.001-08:00

Living in a different city than all of my best friends.

1,814

2010-12-22T09:57:00.001-08:00

The Axe Detailer and advertisements thereof.

1,813

2010-11-29T14:51:00.000-08:00

People who leave ginormous christmas displays on ALL NIGHT LONG. There's no way you can spin that to be a good thing. I dare you.

1,812

2010-11-14T04:06:00.001-08:00

Not enough accolades? You know what? No.

1,811

2010-10-09T10:07:00.001-07:00

No Columbus Day off? Even though I'm a guido?

1,810

2010-10-07T21:15:00.000-07:00

Bedbug infestations. Really?

1,809

2010-10-05T11:08:00.000-07:00

People who use the phrase "inartful" to describe things they wish they hadn't said. Weasel word! Weasel word!

1,808

2010-09-01T08:41:00.001-07:00

Just write me back. I don't care if you're rejecting me, just write fucking back. God. Just hit fucking reply. FUCK.

1,807

2010-07-28T23:21:00.000-07:00

Having to drive through the intersection of Oxford and 5th in Koreatown twice a day, every day. It is where the column of idiocy and the row of danger intersect in an Excel spreadsheet called "The World's Biggest Fucking Horrorshow Ever".

1,806

2010-07-28T23:20:00.000-07:00

The cold terror of a vague impending financial doom.

1,805

2010-07-28T23:19:00.000-07:00

Having the world's stupidest receptionist and having been the one to hire her in the first place.

1,804

2010-07-28T23:18:00.000-07:00

Getting called back, but not cast. Fuck you, I'm as good as it gets.

1,803

2010-07-28T23:17:00.001-07:00

Being too confounded by the horror of it all to post the things that piss you off. For months.

1,802

2010-07-28T09:19:00.001-07:00

Bizarre emails from my dad about all the "widows" he's trying and failing to date.

1,801

2010-07-28T09:16:00.000-07:00

Being sleep-deprived is just a whole level of suck that I am not good at handling.

1,800

2010-07-23T02:30:00.003-07:00

And just to change the subject...dead pets. That sucks a whole fucking hell of a lot.

1,799

2010-07-23T02:29:00.000-07:00

Who am I kidding? Any workplace at quarter-end recap presentation time.

1,798

2010-07-23T02:28:00.000-07:00

And yet, more jokes about stock prices.

1,797

2010-07-23T02:27:00.002-07:00

People who clap at simple Powerpoint animation effects.

1,796

2010-07-23T02:27:00.001-07:00

Follow-up questions.

1,795

2010-07-23T02:26:00.001-07:00

Forced gutteral laughs at very unfunny workplace appropriate jokes.

1,794

2010-07-23T02:24:00.000-07:00

And you, with your bleached teeth and "semi-retired, half-diplomat" parents.

1,793

2010-07-23T02:22:00.000-07:00

You and your hoighty toighty watch, waving it all about in the air, at question time.

1,792

2010-07-23T02:21:00.002-07:00

Being compensated with beach towels.

1,791

2010-07-23T02:21:00.001-07:00

What exactly do you mean "stock" anyway?

1,790

2010-07-23T02:20:00.000-07:00

Oh wait....we were already broke.

1.789

2010-07-23T02:18:00.000-07:00

The stock is falling! My word!

1.788

2010-07-23T02:17:00.001-07:00

Does anybody live here anymore?

1,787

2010-07-23T02:15:00.001-07:00

Snatchery.

1.786

2010-07-21T22:13:00.001-07:00

Twitter slave. Becoming one. Does it really do anything?

1,785

2010-07-19T13:51:00.000-07:00

If you need to say, "Let's think outside the box," you're probably not aware of how far in the box you live and I'm not so sure you're able to truly accomplish your goal.

1,784

2010-07-12T16:01:00.000-07:00

Condescending friends. Especially coming from one about to fall on his face. Hard.

1,783

2010-07-12T13:26:00.000-07:00

No new page edits from A. Tulip in like forever. Seriously, where's the evolution?

1,782

2010-05-24T11:04:00.000-07:00

People who use the phrase "non-fiction novel." If it's a novel, it's fiction.

1,781

2010-05-07T10:53:00.000-07:00

People who criticize the Greek protesters for expecting to be able to retire with pensions when they're in their 60s.

1,780

2010-05-04T16:23:00.000-07:00

Hi, I'm a 30 year old religious fanatic who has to act out so that the civil liberties of innocent people will be violated forever. Also, I'm an incompetent bomb builder. The red wire goes where?

1.779

2010-05-04T15:40:00.000-07:00

Target Stabber. What up the Pseudo-Goth-Glamour-Shots-Gone-Awry Mug Shots???

1,778

2010-04-19T14:29:00.001-07:00

PHANTOM 2, the sequel. UNBELIEVABLE.

1,777

2010-04-17T07:10:00.000-07:00

Rachael Ray.

1,776

2010-04-16T23:58:00.000-07:00

Seriously. Fuck YOU world. You blow all over the place.

1,775

2010-04-16T23:55:00.001-07:00

Dad has prostate cancer. Fuck you, world.

1,774

2010-04-08T05:50:00.001-07:00

...Watching it practically in slow motion because it was totally my own damn, lazy fault: Even worse.

1,773

2010-04-08T05:49:00.000-07:00

Coffee+Laptop+Floor=WAH

1,772

2010-04-05T13:19:00.000-07:00

Hey rightwingers, the next time you associate a member of the current administration with a member of Hitler's regime I'm going to staple the Military Commissions Act and the Patriot Act (both of which YOU'RE favorite asshole president signed into law) to your ass and make you read them. I'm sick of you thinking that helping prevent your fellow humans from dying is a bad thing you christian fuck.

1,771

2010-03-29T10:42:00.000-07:00

I am sick of family bullshit. All of it. Zero tolerance policy from now on.

1,770

2010-03-25T16:32:00.000-07:00

Owners/bosses: "We know you've been working nights and weekends for over a year with no break but just make it to the end of December and things will get back to normal. We promise."

First week back from Christmas break (first vacation in almost two years)...

Owners/bosses: "We really need to get some extra features before the end of the quarter, there's only three of you, and since we just released a major product you will have to support new installs too."

Back to working nights and weekends. Fuck. Off.

1,769

2010-03-24T21:39:00.001-07:00

"give me back that filet o fish. give me that fish."

1,768

2010-03-24T21:38:00.001-07:00

the 5 dollar foot long jingle

1,767

2010-03-17T15:24:00.000-07:00

Overhearing peoples' crazy paranoia over filling out the census form. Lady, I am quite sure you give WAY more personal information away every day on your Facebook page than what the census is asking for.

1,766

2010-03-04T21:48:00.000-08:00

CEO's rich, fat fuck kid running around the office without any shoes on, hanging around the conference rooms, and playing wii all over the goddamn place. Kid, you are too old to act like that. Shouldn't you be working on a coke habit already?

1,765

2010-03-04T21:46:00.000-08:00

Stinky cat.

1,764

2010-03-04T21:43:00.000-08:00

When you hook up an external drive after you moved a file on it and the computer drive is all "Where is file 'you disorganized muther fucka.avi'??"
Screw you computer. It's your job to find it. KNOW already damn you.

1,763

2010-03-04T21:42:00.001-08:00

STILL NOT BEING DONE. STILL!

1,762

2010-03-04T14:27:00.001-08:00

Where I work, people get fired. A LOT. Like I'd say more than half the people I've worked with over my time at the co. have been fired. And it's not always cause they suck. And it has nothing to do with money. I'd say I have a 60% chance of being fired on any given day. Sometimes its more, sometimes its less. But always, its there. I better go steal more cookies.

1,761

2010-03-04T14:25:00.001-08:00

Scratch that...it's been over 3 years.

1,760

2010-03-04T14:23:00.001-08:00

Blaming self for not being more pissed.

1,759

2010-03-04T14:22:00.000-08:00

Dudes, we've been doing this for over 2 years and haven't even cracked 2,000. I thought we were more pissed than this.

1,758

2010-03-04T14:21:00.001-08:00

Having "It's a Hard Knock Life" stuck in your head for weeeeeeeeks.

1,757

2010-03-03T15:17:00.001-08:00

People just NOT GETTING IT.

1,756

2010-03-01T15:27:00.001-08:00

Greed is ugly.

1,755

2010-02-11T14:14:00.001-08:00

I actually got a nasty email from a superior that included the phrase "it's not rocket science." Neither is not being a bitch. Really, who says that?

1,754

2010-02-10T09:57:00.000-08:00

Getting "joke" emails from family about how the snowstorm on the East Coast means Al Gore is a liar and everyone should burn his book for warmth. *sigh*

1,753

2010-02-08T16:18:00.000-08:00

Upon telling a co-worker I'm preggers and having a boy, he says this: "Awesome! With girls, you have to worry about all the penises in the world, but with boys, you only have to worry about one!" Er...yeah. Ahem.

1,752

2010-02-04T15:20:00.001-08:00

"Tea Party Convention." Urrrrrgle.

1,751

2010-02-04T14:28:00.000-08:00

No, family member, no matter how many times you ask, I will not be doing a "belly cast."

1,750

2010-02-04T14:27:00.001-08:00

The flood of "you shoulds" for parenting our child has begun.

1,749

2010-02-03T14:20:00.000-08:00

A loved one getting plastic surgery and looking like they are now The Joker mixed with Lion-Faced Lady. Sooooo sad.

1,748

2010-01-21T10:22:00.000-08:00

I love my apartment. I don't want to go. Can't stay alone. Won't do a craigslist stranger. 5 years - best relationship I've ever been in - coming to an end. The pain. The pain.

1,747

2010-01-21T10:16:00.001-08:00

Get a call on my cell from my roommate while I'm in California for a week on vacation. Goes a little something like this...

me: hey what's going on?
rm: have a minute to talk?
me: well i'm driving back from tahoe in a car full of people.
rm: i wanted to talk to you about this in person... i'm moving out.
me: oh.
rm: early.
me: oh.
rm: and i know i'm not on the lease but i figured i'd stay through it if you want me to.
me (internally): NO SHIT YOU'LL STAY IF I WANT YOU TO. WHAT KIND OF FRIEND WOULDN'T? YOU WERE MY FRIEND FIRST - THAT'S PRETTY MUCH STANDARD PRACTICE. AND WHAT PART OF "CAR FULL OF PEOPLE" MADE YOU THINK THIS WAS A GOOD TIME? AND GIVEN THAT OUR LEASE ISN'T UP FOR, OH, FIVE MONTHS, COULD THIS REALLY NOT HAVE FUCKING WAITED TIL I GOT FUCKING HOME IN FOUR FUCKING DAYS?
me (aloud): let's talk about this when I get home.

1,746

2010-01-05T16:10:00.000-08:00

New kitchen: the refrigerator reeks like rotting flesh, the oven smells like burning chemicals, and the dishwasher just flooded the kitchen floor. I can't cook or make or buy or prepare or retrieve food.

1,745

2010-01-04T10:09:00.001-08:00

Being back at work. Bah!

1,744

2010-01-04T10:04:00.001-08:00

My dad STILL uses AOL and its software and thinks that is the internet.

1,743

2010-01-04T09:56:00.001-08:00

When telling a family member on my side we are having a boy, their response: "There are too many boys already! We need girls!"

THANKS, LIKE I DID THIS ON PURPOSE.