Thursday, July 10, 2008

1,514

The work-related term "compression" as a substitute for the following:
"There is no way in hell we are going to make this deadline."
"Fuckloads of stress."
"Unrealistic expectations being unmet and resulting in spirited finger-pointing."

1,513

Staying late at work every single night for two weeks and having to go in over the weekend in order to even be able to take a vacation.

1,512

Working like a dog.

1,511

Being unable to mask one's frustration.

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

1,510

When your night gets "chunked out."

1,509

God damn the USA

And Obama voted for it.

1,508

Seeing a movie, specifically the crapfest Wanted, with someone who is distracted and text messaging throughout the entire film.

Monday, July 7, 2008

1,507

I can't seem to outgrow the memory of mega-douche blogger calling me stupid in calc class.

1,506

mega-douche blogger has a thriving writing career while I'm stuck sitting next to mega-douche jr. at my crappy job because I can't support myself on my own writing.

1,505

mega-douche coworker makes the same amount of money I do.

1,504

Walking into the office to see that my blog-reading mega-douche co"worker" is reading the politico-blog of a semi-celebrity mega-douche I went to high school with.

1,503

Will someone please tell my aching body that I'm not that old yet?

1,502

I am so over this guy. I cannot imagine having to be related to this person and have to hang out with him on a constant basis. The years stretch out before me in this scenario and I shudder.

1,501

Blowhard comes over to our house but never wants to do anything except watch tv and every time we try to break out a board game he becomes miserable and jerky about it because we apparently are a horrible family who is ruining the fabric of America because we are "so competetive."

1,500

Blowhard then proceeds to say that he wishes every book by Jane Austen was taken out and burned. Dude, get out of my house!

1,499

Blowhard having absolutely no argument behind his argument and finally ending it with, "they're just stupid and should only be on the stage." At which point he turns on the TV to watch the Simpsons do a musical number.

1,498

"In my day we had Indiana Jones, not musical crap!" Uhhh....what?

1,497

Blowhard coming into my house and saying that the fact that kids watch musicals raises "a nation of homos."

Thursday, July 3, 2008

1,496

Being consistently creamed on Scrabulous by the World's Smartest Scrabble-Playing Cousin.

1,495

Weird student film auditions where the director is really vague and takes long pauses where you're not sure if she's waiting for you to say something and the room feels bizarre and uncomfortable.