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Get a call on my cell from my roommate while I'm in California for a week on vacation. Goes a little something like this...

me: hey what's going on?
rm: have a minute to talk?
me: well i'm driving back from tahoe in a car full of people.
rm: i wanted to talk to you about this in person... i'm moving out.
me: oh.
rm: early.
me: oh.
rm: and i know i'm not on the lease but i figured i'd stay through it if you want me to.
me (internally): NO SHIT YOU'LL STAY IF I WANT YOU TO. WHAT KIND OF FRIEND WOULDN'T? YOU WERE MY FRIEND FIRST - THAT'S PRETTY MUCH STANDARD PRACTICE. AND WHAT PART OF "CAR FULL OF PEOPLE" MADE YOU THINK THIS WAS A GOOD TIME? AND GIVEN THAT OUR LEASE ISN'T UP FOR, OH, FIVE MONTHS, COULD THIS REALLY NOT HAVE FUCKING WAITED TIL I GOT FUCKING HOME IN FOUR FUCKING DAYS?
me (aloud): let's talk about this when I get home.