1,741

Having someone tell me for an hour over lunch to "make sure to not get fat" with my pregnancy.

1,740

People who use "God does not give you more than you can handle" on ladies on baby message boards who have found out their babies have tested positive for genetic diseases.

1,739

Adverts for psychic predictions and tarot readings. Really? It's nearly 2010 and people still think their future can be read from a deck of cards? That's about two inches from reading a pig's entrails on the evolutionary scale. That's all we've come in 2000 years?

1,738

PAL vs NTSC. Wtf.

1,737

Wishing there was some way to gracefully opt-out of Christmas gift giving in a year where all financial resources are desperately needed elsewhere, but knowing that you're still going to have to suck it up and get random crap for people.

1,736

Not knowing what to get my nieces and nephews for Christmas anymore because they don't care about books and apparently don't know how to read anyway and they have more toys than any kid would know what to do with.

1,735

Finding out through other people that my niece and nephew are way behind in their stupid Christian school and knowing that there's nothing I can do about it.

1,734

Being unable to talk about a medical test I got just in case it upsets someone morally.

1,733

Half days that seem interminable.

1,732

Having your hand forced when you'd hoped to resolve something quietly.

1,731

I was requested to temp at my old job at hubby's office and no one at my agency told me and they sent someone else instead!!!  GAH!!!

1,730

Suddenly paranoid about the safety of writing things here for no real reason but an irrational fear that certain people have found this blog.

1,729

Forgetting there was such a perfect forum for discontent.

1,728

A family member choosing to stay home to have Thanksgiving with their DOG instead of with real humans.

1,727

RE: 1,726

Last week was our open enrollment meeting during which our insurance representative told us that the large part of premiums going up and coverage going down was due to increasing medical costs and that we should endeavor to not get sick. The myriad of things wrong with this could fill a book not least of which is I paid for the bulk of my last yearly physical checkup out of pocket so they won't pay if I get sick but they won't help to keep me healthy. Public option, FTW.

1,726

The new healthcare options the company is offering are way, way, WAY WAYWAY worse than the previous year. Things are about to get astronomically more expensive up in here. This is really broken.

1,725

RE: 1,724

1,725a: My friend recently referred to his girlfriend + dog as his "family."

1,725b: Being forced to end friendships abruptly.

1,724

People who refer to their dog (in earnest) as "our son."

1723

People who use the term "bullish" in a non-financial context. As in, "Russia is bullish on sanctions against Iran." No. No it isn't.

1,722

My freaking printer.

1721

Senators who say they won't "vote for a bill I haven't read." They never read the bills.

1720

My friends' art gallery and living space caught on fire a few nights ago and they lost their sweet pet doggie, countless pieces of art and their home.

1,719

Apparently, being an insurance company shill and shouting the most innane lies works.

Good job, assholes.

1,718

The new woman living across from us is a yelling Armenian harpie from hell. She yells at and nags her daughter ALL DAY EVERY DAY, and I can hear her making her daughter cry constantly. Her voice has this specific tone that cuts through glass, wall, and bone. I have noticed that the sound of her voice is literally starting to make my stomach hurt when I hear it. She must be stopped.

1,717

28 year olds with cystic fibrosis.

1,716

The line at the Post Office. The one I could have waited on if I'd known my 3:00 call was about to get called off. The one I won't wait on til at least tomorrow because it's the seventh circle of hot out there and I don't want to leave my apartment again. Ever.

1,715

Not knowing if I should go with 1,715 to account for a doubling-up, or 1,714 to make up for the evidently-skipped 1,698.

1,714

Having a call canceled 4 minutes before it was scheduled. And this after having been pushed back twice. Um, you're the ones begging for press, are you freaking kidding me here?

1,713

STOP using the word "cougar" in relation to women. STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT.

1,713

Have you ever paid attention to the lyrics of "Tennessee Waltz"?

That's some cold-blooded shit.

1,712

People who talk on cell phones in saunas. (They don't, however, talk on them in the steam room.)

1,711

People who make excessive noise in the sauna and/or steam room. Yes, we know its hot in there. THAT'S WHY WE ARE IN THERE.

1,710

Calling attention to a payment irregularity from a publication I write for... and being told by the Ed Asst that if I had kept my mouth shut I would have been paid twice for the assignment and "they would NEVER have noticed."

Honesty gets you nowhere, and karma is a lie we truth-tellers tell ourselves.

1,709

Pissed bloggers who think that 1,699 comes right after 1,697.

_{don't hit me}

1,708

Photo-enforced intersections. Do we want to get used to cameras watching us all the time? Do voters not see the literary reference here?

1,707

Someone got shot three times in the head in front of the building next door to mine. Tell me why I live in the city, please?

1,706

And then getting the ticket in the mail - $500 bucks. Stupid Los Angeles.

1,705

Having just put plates on new car and then driving through a photo enforced stop light (right-turn on red - is this REALLY that big a deal??)

1,704

Having to buy a new car in shitty economy.

1,703

Pets dying.

1,702

Michael Jackson still dominating headlines. Hey America! He made made sometimes entertaining pop music but that's about it. If Ghandi died to today he would get about a day's worth of headlines. Stephen Hawking, page E4.

1,701

Realizing how easy it is to completely neglect things (and how often I do it).

1,700

FLUX

1,699

My boss got a call that his mother died this morning and he's being extremely non-chalant and cavalier about it. "It's ok, it's ok! I'm just glad the waiting is over!" Uhh. Yeah.

1,697

The waiting is the hardest part.

1,696

Self-righteousness. And the fact that I get bothered by it.

1,695

Being told by an idiot that I "don't like comedy" and that I only like "big budget movies" and "crap like Steel Magnolias 2." WTF?

1,694

ch3lk being (what feels like literally) consumed by his job.

1,693

Being (what feels like literally) consumed by my job.

1,692

Being forcibly related to someone who loves to hate actors (he even has a button that says "I hate actors!" that he wears to plays). Latest: "I let my dog poop in front of these jerk actors who were learning lines at Starbucks. They just want attention." GUESS WHAT, jerkoff, it's where people meet to work on shit!

1,691

My skin: "You have a film AND a video shoot this weekend? I'd better break out NOW!!"

1,690

Getting a hair color that is 100% not what you asked for.

1,689

SO VERY BUMMED they haven't called me back for the show I really wanted to be in. *sob*

1,688

(exasperated sibling): Why do you have to PLAN everything? Why can't you just DO it?

BECAUSE I AM FUCKING BUSY, THAT'S WHY!!!!!!!!! GOD!!!

1,687

It's the worst feeling when your darkest fears about someone turn out to be completely true.

1,686

Being told by your doctor that you have no hope for recovery and basically will just have to "live with it."

1,685

Being grumpy about something I deeply should not be grumpy about.

1,684

Finding out crazy shit about your family history and not being able to tell everyone about it!!!

1,682

Seeing the creepy-ass stuff that is in your dad's email inbox. *wugga*

1,682

My dad is really ill. :(

1,681

Giant Cheetos. The end times are officially upon us now.

1,680

Being unable to attend a dear friend's wedding due to finances.

1,679

War Drones.

1,678

Ultra depressing car commercials about how they'll react when you lose your job. Are they going to offer neck rubs next?

1,677

That the Lakers star is at worst, a rapist, and at best, an admitted adulterer. Besides being a giant douche bag.

1,676

Laker car flags.

1,675

Lakers fans.

1,674

The Lakers.

1,673

$500 eye doctor visit and my vision seems worse than before.

1,672

That despite all of our supposed medical advances, something called "Swine Flu" could still take us out.

1,671

Not knowing if I will have a job this time next month. Or next week, for that matter.

1,670

Please stop telling me to "have a good one." I can't handle the ambiguity of it all!

1,669

OH MY HOLY FUCKING CHRIST, assisting sucks.

1,668

I can't help but take it a bit personally that a former beloved teacher of mine won't call or write me back after I told her I was interested in auditioning for something she's directing.

1,667

I'm back at an earlier job assignment because the new girl "got measles." Uhhhhhh, should I be concerned? I wish someone had told me before I started touching everything.

1,666

HOLY MOTHER OF GOD, AT&T, you are all INSANE. I should not have to be on the phone with you for TWO HOURS because you broke my text messaging. Why can't anyone there take notes to remember anything??

1,665

I don't even remotely know what's up with the numbering on this thing anymore, I'm just using my own stupid system at this point.

1,664

I feel bad that I have no idea who some of these Facebook "friends" of mine are who I apparently went to high school with.

1,664

I have no idea what my "career" is anymore.

1,663

Have to make EVERY DAMN FILE LABEL in god damn Comic Sans font because someone "prefers" it. What is WRONG with you?

1,662

LOOK, friend who I never see, you are not allowed to be passive aggressively upset with me because we never get together when you live more than an hour away and have babies who have to be in bed by 8! Do the math!

1,661

Being someone's stupid ass assistant. I've forgotten how lame this is.

1,660

People bitching and moaning loudly and at length about having to pay money for music.

1,659

MY DAD IS SO FREAKIN' WEIRD!

1,658

My neighbor's dog barking right underneath my bedroom window precisely one hour before my alarm is set to go off. Every day.

1,657

My socks are bunching up into my shoes today.

1,656

Friends who make you so anxious your stomach hurts just thinking about them.

1,654

Probably didn't get the job due to "personality differences." Read: I didn't do enough corporate kiss-assing.

1,653

My perfect, comfy, waterproof boots giving out in the heel one week before my trip.

1,652

That an activity as seemingly benign as crocheting will apparently be the straw on the backs of my wrists to carpel tunnel.

1,651

Getting into a great workout routine and injuring your stupid shoulder = back to square one....rargh.

1,650

Trying not to be hurt about the fact that NOT ONE of our non-parental family members have bought or listened to or even asked about our new album coming out.

1,649

Being upset about not getting something you didn't want.

1,648

Websites that don't work, and losing time/effort trying to use them.

1,647

Can you lay off a temp? If so, I just got laid off.

1,646

Working really hard on a special, hand-made Christmas present for someone and getting NO THANK YOU for it.

1,645

People who deliberately cutesy up words for no particular reason, i.e., "I heard the idea in general tho that w/ the belt tightening and freezing of open posishes there may also be a freezing of temps?"

Posishes? REALLY?

1,644

People who say "whatevs" without irony.

1,643

Impatient instant messengers. GIVE ME A FREAKING SECOND, I'm at WORK!!!

1,642

MOCKING FUCKING BIRD all night long, every night, no sleep, hate hate hate.

1,641

I wish I had taken some Dharma Cookie home. I am dumb.

1,643

Decisions.

1,642

Knowing that something is coming, but neither what nor when.

1,641

I second #1,640. Gah!

1,640

Being insatiably hungry ALL THE FREAKIN TIME.

1,639

Madoff: still not in jail.

1,638

My workplace is cutting costs by getting rid of temps. Looks like my gig is up. Very depressed about this.

1,637

"You guys should let me produce you. I'd do a much better job."

1,636

"I listened to your new album," (he didn't, he heard an old one) "and I didn't understand why there were dance tracks and then slow tracks."

1,635

"Do you guys have a direction you're taking your music in, or are you just throwing it out there?"

1,634

Doofus in our office who calls himself a "music producer" giving all kinds of horrible "advice."

1,633

Being guilted into something.

1,631

I am technologically cursed.

1,630

Having to say "happy new year" just because there's this emptiness in the air when you don't. Like there's an unspoken rule between December 28th and January 4th that if you don't say "happy new year" you are a dick.

1,629

Bonus: Had to read that story online because people still steal my fucking newspaper. Seriously. Seriously. What kind of person steals a newspaper? I just want to know. I want to understand you.

1,628

9 Muslims Are Pulled From Plane and Denied Re-entry; Airline Apologizes Next Day

this is the country we live in.